“The future ain’t what it used to be.”
-- Yogi Berra
The next morning, Friday, I felt groggy, sicky, slightly dizzy, and generally worn out. After my suboxone experience on Thursday, I decided that ¼ rather than ½ tablet would be the proper dosage. Over the next week, I took ¼ tab sublingually in the morning. Although miraculous is too strong a word, the suboxone had a wondrous affect on me.
It literally quelled my desire, for sex, for beer, for everything. Twas passing strange, doggone it. For me, a control freak whose identity has been defined to a great degree by chasing my desires, it was an epiphany, a chemically altered perspective that validated Heisenberg’s principle. It cleared my head. As the chemo fog lifted so too did the opiate haze dissipate. My thinking became more focused.
In practical terms, the suboxone does two things for the addict: it negates the craving, the oxy junkie typically craves more every 4-6 hours; secondly, it negates all withdrawal symptoms. Perhaps the molecular structure of the buprenorphine opiate is such that it lasts longer than the time interval from dose to dose. Whatever the case, there is neither craving nor withdrawal. It unshackles the addict from constantly watching the clock and thinking about when he’s going to get his next fix.
Although the chemically induced happiness was nice, cozy and comfortable, it was also, for me, a false paradise. I was sick of being sick, and fed up with taking medications. After a week, on Friday, January 25th, I met again with Dr. B., showed him the pills I had left, and told him I was ready to wean myself from everything. After patiently listening to his advice that I continue on the smallest dose for 2-4 months, I said I was ready for the fast landing.
This is how it went: after a week on the minimal dose, on Saturday, January 26th, I cut the pill in half and took this dose for 3 days. On 29, 30, and 31, I took a quarter pill, and on February 1, 2, and 3 (Super Bowl Sunday), I took an eighth. That was the last time I took any pills of any kind.
It’s been one month now, and I’ve been to the gym for the last 21 days. I swim a ½ mile everyday, and alternate between cardio and weights every other day. But this story is a little too nice, don’t you agree. You may ask, “well Randy, how was the 4th, 5th, 6th, and those days that followed your last dose?”
Here’s a brief primer on withdrawal (this is taken from, “Suboxone The Drug Blog”: “Withdrawal produces drug craving, muscle and bone pain, insomnia, diarrhea and vomiting, cold flashes with goose bumps (‘cold turkey’), kicking movements (‘kicking the habit’), and other symptoms.”
The 1st day I felt pretty good. Days 2-8 were miserable. The suboxone was a godsend, but there really is no magic bullet. By a hardcore addicts lights my withdrawal was fairly easy. There was no vomiting, but I did experience a low-grade manifestation of the rest of the symptoms.
As I say, it’s been a month since I quit (kicked, if you will) and life is beautiful. After two weeks, the feeling that something was missing from my life, that an old friend had died, the psychological pull, began to ebb. Although suboxone helps if you really want to quit, will power is still a key part of the therapy. Exercise (if you can do it) helps tremendously. Endorphins work and they’re cheap!
-- Yogi Berra
The next morning, Friday, I felt groggy, sicky, slightly dizzy, and generally worn out. After my suboxone experience on Thursday, I decided that ¼ rather than ½ tablet would be the proper dosage. Over the next week, I took ¼ tab sublingually in the morning. Although miraculous is too strong a word, the suboxone had a wondrous affect on me.It literally quelled my desire, for sex, for beer, for everything. Twas passing strange, doggone it. For me, a control freak whose identity has been defined to a great degree by chasing my desires, it was an epiphany, a chemically altered perspective that validated Heisenberg’s principle. It cleared my head. As the chemo fog lifted so too did the opiate haze dissipate. My thinking became more focused.
In practical terms, the suboxone does two things for the addict: it negates the craving, the oxy junkie typically craves more every 4-6 hours; secondly, it negates all withdrawal symptoms. Perhaps the molecular structure of the buprenorphine opiate is such that it lasts longer than the time interval from dose to dose. Whatever the case, there is neither craving nor withdrawal. It unshackles the addict from constantly watching the clock and thinking about when he’s going to get his next fix.
Although the chemically induced happiness was nice, cozy and comfortable, it was also, for me, a false paradise. I was sick of being sick, and fed up with taking medications. After a week, on Friday, January 25th, I met again with Dr. B., showed him the pills I had left, and told him I was ready to wean myself from everything. After patiently listening to his advice that I continue on the smallest dose for 2-4 months, I said I was ready for the fast landing.
This is how it went: after a week on the minimal dose, on Saturday, January 26th, I cut the pill in half and took this dose for 3 days. On 29, 30, and 31, I took a quarter pill, and on February 1, 2, and 3 (Super Bowl Sunday), I took an eighth. That was the last time I took any pills of any kind.
It’s been one month now, and I’ve been to the gym for the last 21 days. I swim a ½ mile everyday, and alternate between cardio and weights every other day. But this story is a little too nice, don’t you agree. You may ask, “well Randy, how was the 4th, 5th, 6th, and those days that followed your last dose?”
Here’s a brief primer on withdrawal (this is taken from, “Suboxone The Drug Blog”: “Withdrawal produces drug craving, muscle and bone pain, insomnia, diarrhea and vomiting, cold flashes with goose bumps (‘cold turkey’), kicking movements (‘kicking the habit’), and other symptoms.”
The 1st day I felt pretty good. Days 2-8 were miserable. The suboxone was a godsend, but there really is no magic bullet. By a hardcore addicts lights my withdrawal was fairly easy. There was no vomiting, but I did experience a low-grade manifestation of the rest of the symptoms.
As I say, it’s been a month since I quit (kicked, if you will) and life is beautiful. After two weeks, the feeling that something was missing from my life, that an old friend had died, the psychological pull, began to ebb. Although suboxone helps if you really want to quit, will power is still a key part of the therapy. Exercise (if you can do it) helps tremendously. Endorphins work and they’re cheap!
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