Phonies and Heroes: Pat Tillman & Rush Limbaugh

“Duty is what one expects from others, it is not what one does oneself.”
-- Oscar Wilde, “A Woman of no Importance,” 1893

Would Rush Limbaugh’s charge that those serving in Iraq and Afghanistan who question our involvement in Iraq and Afghanistan are “phony soldiers” include Pat Tillman? Lantern–jawed and looking every bit the all American boy, Tillman was the perfect super hero poster boy for the New World Order. His willingness to quit football and give up a lucrative NFL contract to defend our country from the terrorist hordes made him a convenient propagandistic icon of patriotic virtue.

The “phony” legend Rummy cooked up was this: Pat Tillman, although surrounded by superior numbers of enemy troops, went out with both guns blazing. In the best Sergeant-Rockian tradition, Tillman sacrificed himself to a higher cause. How convenient that his death came at a time when Bush’s approval ratings were spiraling downward, and the unimaginable events at Abu Ghraib were just coming to light. So it was no coincidence when the government made up a “phony” John Wayne story about Tillman falling in a hail of Taliban gunfire in awarding him the Silver Star.

There were two problems with this: 1) Tillman was no fawning Gomer Pyle, my country-right-or-wrong guy; 2) according to the Associated Press, “the Army doctors--whose names were blacked out—said that the bullet holes were so close together that it appeared the Army Ranger was cut down by an M-16 fired from a mere 10 yards or so away.” According to his mother, Mary Tillman, in her new book, “Boots On The Ground By Dusk,” (2008), “The Army used him. They knew right away he was killed by fratricide [She refuses to use the phrase ‘friendly fire’] and they used him for their own purposes to promote the war, to get sympathy for the war, for five weeks.”

Regarding the myth of Pat Tillman, the gung-ho, these-colors-don’t-run, warrior zealot? It simply wasn’t true. According to the San Francisco Chronicle, there was “A side of Pat Tillman not widely known—a fiercely independent thinker who enlisted, fought, and died in service to his country yet was critical of president Bush and opposed the war in Iraq, where he served a tour of duty. He was an avid reader whose interests ranged from history books…to works of leftist Noam Chomsky, a favorite author.”

So, who killed this “phony soldier,” and, more importantly, why?

Perhaps the only real “phony soldiers” in Iraq are the Blackwater Contractors.

If the opposite of “phony” is “genuine,” let’s talk about a “genuine” American Hero story. It’s time to tell the tail…err…tale of Rush Limbaugh’s anal deferment. Such heroism!

It’s too bad Rush can’t kiss his own ass. After all, it got him out of the Vietnam War.

Once upon a time, actually in 1970, the old anti-feminazi himself, Rush Limbaugh, stooped to roosting with the chickenhawks (Recall that the peace symbol is the footprint of the American chicken). Selective Service System records show that after dropping out of Southeast Missouri State University, Limbaugh lost his student deferment and was classified 1-A. Curiously, however, on November 24th 1970, he was reclassified 1-Y, which exempted him from being drafted. Even more questionable is the fact that, since no records exist of his taking a pre-induction physical, the 1-Y status was assigned based on a report submitted by the Huckster’s…I mean Rushter's, own personal physician. According to Limbaugh’s biographer, Paul D. Colford:

“As for Limbaugh himself, the broadcaster stated that he was not drafted during the Vietnam War because he had been classified 4-F after a physical found that he had an ‘inoperable pilonidal cyst.’” Holy venereal warts, Robin, the dude had a butt pimple.

Note here that Limbaugh’s status was based upon a report from his own private doctor, and not an Armed Services physician. Was this the same guy that recently prescribed his Vicodin? No, that’s right, he got those from his illegal immigrant maid.

So what are we to make of the hypocritical, yet all too typical, cowardliness of those who saved their own ass (excuse the pun) so that others might fight the wars they would later advocate?

What does Limbaugh have to say about these facts that are a matter of record?

Here’s an excerpt from a call he took on his December 2002 radio show:

CALLER: And Rush, you never mentioned how you dodged the Vietnam draft.

LIMBAUGH: I didn’t.

CALLER: Yes you did. You claimed you had a boil on your butt.

LIMBAUGH: No, you see, that’s part of popular mythology that is out there that I have not whined nor complained about, Greg. Never happened. Was not the cause, wasn’t the case.

“Phony” soldiers, indeed!