Begin Nadir 3

9/17/07

“You’re not supposed to be so blind with patriotism that you can’t face reality. Wrong is wrong, no matter who does it or who says it.”
-- Malcolm X, 1965

Agenda:
Fiction
Politics
Current Events

FICTION

Stories From Camp Kitsch (cont.)

…At daybreak, Pluto awakened to a primordial fear beyond words. He heard that terrifying sound of his prison days waxing and waning in the distance, the baying of bloodhounds. Weak and panic-stricken, he contemplated his chances. He could stay and face the inevitable, the Talion court of the avenging dead. That was suicide. Or he could flee. He headed toward the lake.

It was just after dawn when he crossed the Iron River. “What time was it? How long had it been light?” Stopping to catch his breath, he heard a soft, plaintive cry. “A sign! A sign!"

Then it came: dragging through the brush, trailing a bloody, useless leg and mewling softly, a yearling doe appeared. Her grotesquely twisted spine slowed her.

For Pluto, this sad, desperate beast, revealed an inviolable existential truth: the instinct to hope. In her eyes he saw mans' singular affliction: the capacity of the reasoning mind to deny, to annihilate, to strangle, and to suffocate hope. A pitiful confirmation of Pluto's belief that the potential for pre-meditated cruelty inherent to human reason--the ability to justify, to transcend the slither of instinct--could be redemptive.

The world closed around him. Frantically, he ran for his life. Picking up his scent, the hounds bay rose to a howl. Now cornered, he stumbled, collapsed, and gasped for breath. Suddenly they were silent. Pluto momentarily froze. Then, as the unholy choir renewed its relentless howl, he staggered toward the sound of the breakers. Suddenly a black chasm opened in the trees ahead. The dogs were everywhere. Pluto put his faith in the dark. He found the lake, the cliff, the knife-like sleet of salvation. Across the water he could see the Big Bay lighthouse. 60 feet below him the waves pounded the jagged boulders. He never hesitated.

POLITICS

“Camus said that the one serious question of philosophy is whether or not to commit suicide; the one serious question of political philosophy is whether or not to get out of bed. Silly as it may have seemed at the time, John and Yoko’s famous stunt was based on a profound observation. Instant Karma is not so instant—we ratify it day by day.”
-- Garret Keizer, 10/07 Harpers

One would think an administration that threatens the very Constitution of this country would merit stronger protest from its citizens. Sacrificing our sons and daughters on the altar of Neo-con ideology would also seem to qualify as a legitimate call to arms. In many ways, our neglect in not holding the current administration accountable amounts to what I would call a tacit approval of their policies. What does it take to get the public’s attention? Far too much, I’m afraid. Keizer frames the question this way: “As long as we’re willing to go on with our business, Bush and Cheney will feel free to go on with their coup. As long as we’re willing to continue fucking ourselves, why should they have any scruples about telling us to smile during the act?”

CURRENT EVENTS/MEDICAL

I injected myself with Neulasta today. You may recall me talking about--how could you forget—a shot that stimulates the white blood cell count. I think I did it right? Neulasta (pegfilgrastim) was the cause of the severe bone pain I experienced during my last cycle (#2) of chemotherapy. Aside from bone pain and the rare possibility of splenic rupture (sounds like a religious experience), the side effects are minimal. I suppose I should say more about my disease, my life, music, the world, football; I’m just not sure that what I have to say is that interesting. Next Monday I have my picture taken with K’Len Morris, a guard on the U-M basketball team. The players were asked to contact a favorite professor for a media guide shot. Thank you, K’Len. I’ll get one with DeShawn Sims, too. What a character. Putting my e-mail on the blog turned out to be a good idea, as was posting R. J.s web-sites. Speaking of the blog, you may have noticed a new look. The coolness is courtesy of Ms. Brigitte, my dear companion. Thank you, B..

One of the curious aspects of Cancer therapy has to do with the blurry distinction between treating the disease and treating the treatment. Notwithstanding the idea that the 6 treatment cycle should be followed in the same way as an antibiotic regimen, it is also possible--when the disease is diagnostically undetectable at the end of round 2, for instance—that any further chemo may result in more damage than good. My intent here is less to question the wisdom of the medical establishment than to provoke issues that might lead to better therapeutic alternatives. Today starts the second week of the 3rd cycle. Typically, this has been the physical and psychological low point, “nadir” if you will, in terms of recovering for the next bout. So how do I feel? Not bad.

Palliative care is an issue often discussed here. On or about September 10 there was a series of articles in The New York Times related to how the under treatment of pain constitutes a worldwide crisis. While inadequate palliative care is a public health problem in poor countries, it is also a serious issue in wealthier nations. As the executive director of Compassion & Choices, David C. Leven, points out, “A recent survey of 4,000 cancer patients in Europe revealed two of three are in pain and that one-third of these patients sometimes had so much pain that they wanted to die.” Regarding the U.S., one of the negative consequences of defining substance abuse as a criminal rather than medical problem is the draconian/puritanical attitude that informs opinions about health care. The cultural assumption that drug addiction equals criminality has made it such that physicians must police themselves, lest they face prosecution for what, in most cases, is a matter of professional judgment. As Garry S. Sklar, M. D., writes, “Physicians in the United States are phobic about prescribing adequate doses of narcotics for fear of government sanction or patient addiction.” Keeping in mind that it has long been established that patients in pain do not become addicted, there is no reason that any patient anywhere suffer needlessly. And yet, as Leven notes, “A survey of New York State doctors reported in 2005 that occasionally or frequently one-third of them prescribed lower doses of an opioid drug for outpatients with chronic pain because of concern about investigation by a regulatory agency.”