MURDER IN MY HEART FOR THE jUdgE: tHaT fat old PIG wouldn't bUdGe!

I got murder in my heart for the judge
Murder in my heart for the judge
That fat old pig…err…judge
Wouldn’t budge
(I wouldn’t want any of you sexist, racist, ignorami out there to take umbrage.)


Separation of Church and State?



"With this ring I do thee wed."

Why am I mad at the judge? He wants to spoil my fun. I hope the right wing majority on the Supreme Court keeps letting Scalia yap. What a card. Why wasn’t I blogging in 2003 when the court struck down the Texas Sodomy laws and set the tone for social progress in the area of gay rights? The Lawrence v. Texas decision prompted Scalia’s dissenting opinion that the majority ruling would cause a “massive disruption of the current social order.” Lions, and tigers, and bears, oh my! Scalia couldn’t stop there. “The queers are coming, the queers are coming!” He didn’t say that, I did.

Since we all know Antonin channels God herself, he admonished the non-debauched that state laws ”against bigamy, same-sex marriage, adult incest, prostitution, masturbation, fornication, bestiality, and obscenity” would rule the day. What, no Francophobia? Woe unto you sinners! Let’s ruin my fun backwards. At the risk of sounding like a bad college writer, let me say the dictionary defines fornication as sexual intercourse between partners who are not married to each other. That’s in the middle, stupid. I thought you said backwards. Shut up, Me. Alright, alright, backwards it is. Judgie is a party pooper, Judgie is a party pooper.

No more obscenity? I’ve got one thing to say, FUCK THAT! Bestiality? I can’t tell you how upset Shadow was when I read her this, Satchmo too (that’s my cat). Fornication? Broke that law in 1st, no, 2nd grade. Adultery, hmmm…ok, all right, guilty as charged; but only with four of my wives. Masturbation? Only when I’m driving. Prostitution? Tried it once, but I can’t get it up if they don’t really love me. It was in Atlanta, and her name was Angel. I gave her the money and we watched TV. The guy I was with suggested it, and he had fun. I guess he was tired of my blow jobs. Adult-incest? Whew! Finally, a reason to end up in a cooler section of Hell! Praise God! Same-sex marriage? Nancy drove me to it? It was to an old doctor-playing buddy, he had a nice bedside manner. Bigamy? You’ll notice I didn’t say “previous wives” 15 sentences ago, maybe it was 14.

Love - Randy xxxoo