Granny & the Volcano

Dear T:

I think your suffering sometimes leaves us -- at least myself, I know – at a place where words lose their meaning. Think not link; think chain. You are the chain. You are strong as the chain is strong. That will never change. You’re right, how could one know how they might react to profound suffering. Our duty, you too, is to ease the way when the way’s not easy, along the big journey that never ends; that trip we who love you are all a part of.Danny Cook sent me a recent painting of a sailboat setting out on Gitchee Gumee in the early morning. Very beautiful. Fear, apprehension, grinding, it sucks. We love you.

-- Randy,

PS: Make our strength your pleasure, not your worry.

Such a thing, the internet. My sick pal has a carepages blog that keeps family and friends posted. Over the course of his illness the blog has served as a social network where people that haven’t seen each other for 40 years are suddenly reacquainted around the common theme of an ailing comrade. What’s most profound about this, as a pragmatic genre, are the conventions of sympathetic and empathetic expression specific to both my friend’s posts and his readers’ comments. Which is a fancy way of saying the carepages is not entered into as a social network as much as a window through which my friend and I can look to one another for consolation.

The pane is the pain.

And so we viewers suffer from a lack of knowing what to say, what to do, how to act, and where to look for an end to our suffering, and his pain. Out of this shared affliction of concern comes good: like small reconciliations and belated foregivenesses. My friend, S., came to me and apologized for once punching me at the Music Manor. “No worries,” I told him, “You’re” forgiven. And you, my friend, have my gratitude for reminding me what a wonderful thing it is to ask forgiveness and be forgiven.

NEW TOPIC

Haven’t blogged in a while but I have to do something to get that last depressing post out of my sight. Funny how seeing people suffer around you produces a certain cynicism about humankind when coupled with hearing about a university wide directive that pretty much forbids U-M physicians from prescribing medical marijuana. No doubt this has to do with its federal and corporate ties. After all, we wouldn’t want an effective medicine that the pharmaceutical arm of the new world order can’t economically exploit to fall into the wrong hands, like the suffering masses that need it. Only today, the news broke that hordes of baby boomers are re-headed for their bongs. Turns out the Zig-Zag man quiets Parkinson’s.

Fire up the lava lamp and get out the clapper, we’re getting high, Granny.

“Now Granny, I got a question for ya. Everyday you been goin to them infernal tea bag, or, tea party, meetings, wassup wid dat?”

“Well, you know how I like Glen Beck, and how I hate Progressivism; and how I can’t stand them poor people feedin off Uncle Sam’s tit; and how I loathe them welfare women using abortion for contraceptives; and them death panels determinin when we’re gonna die; and O’Biden telling us we can’t have nice doctors like we used to; well, I decided to go see Sarah Palin speak at a tea party.”

“Come on, Granny, get with it ironsides, look at those Jiffy-Mix-Transplant-Wheezers. Those dudes look like they’re a major disease about to happen. These twinkie hounds should want all of the free health care they can get. Starting with AED’s (automated external defibrillators), oxygen tanks, and Flomax machines at every rally. Heard Palin’s mad about the Down Syndrome kid on Family Guy. Like Andrea says, Palin, ‘Chill Out.’”

“Just coz I got a vaporizer don’t make me no liberal.”

“Amen, Granny.”

“Cool it, and go make some brownies, Granny. And don’t forget to get Mcgee’s special malted shake mix ready.”

Where was I. Oh yeah, U-M’s decision special directive. It seems to me there should be a certain amount of physician’s autonomy that allows a doctor to determine what’s in a patient’s best interest in terms of treatment. I’m sure it’s less about how effective or ineffective pot is as a medication, than how to prevent access to it until the powers that be find a way to profit from it. I suppose the facade of public good and propriety the university puts forth can’t allow simply charging patients $100 a pop and pocketing the windfall. I suppose further, the U.’s insatiable greed hasn’t gotten to the point where it can feels comfortable being the biggest pot dealer in Michigan. It’s not about suffering; it’s about money.

Love - Randy